Friday, February 26, 2010

Sold!

I just won my first-ever bid on eBay today! Not that there was any stiff competition (I believe I was the only one who bid for the product!), but nevertheless, it still felt rewarding.

My purchase is a copy of Artemis Fowl: The Arctic Incident, in the old cover design that I wanted. The price difference from the online purchase versus the usual retail price wasn't all that astronomical (UP: about $14.50; eBay price: $10). So why not just go to the nearest mall and get a brand-new copy?

I have this thing about collecting books in old(er) covers, particularly if they come in a series. I guess it's a habit I got from an old colleague of mine, who would pore over the shelves on second-hand book shoppes for old cover designs. I thought that was a really cool idea, and so a few weeks after I discovered that hobby of his, I was already competing with him on the shelves (one time, he made a mistake of putting down a copy of Stephen King's The Shining because he couldn't make up his mind. He regretted it after I snapped it up in less than 10 seconds.).

Going back to the AF series, I wanted it because of the cover, as I had purchased books 1 and 3 in the same design, and what is available in the bookstores are those in the crappy new cover (t would ruin my collection's look). Book 1 was bought from an out-of-the-way children's book shoppe, which I thought I could drag my lazy arse to any old time I wanted the next installments. But, yeah, I've got a lazy arse, so Book 1 was long finished and I still had no Book 2.

Then, a few weeks ago, there was a big book sale at the city area. My friend told me to go because she had seen a lot of AFs and Paulo Coelhos. But because I was in another place at the time, I opted to go the following day. By the time I arrived, all the AFs were gone, save for a worn-out-ish copy of Book 3, in the cover I wanted. So I bought that, along with a host of other titles.

And now, at last, I have found Book 2! Didn't I say it was rewarding? And it comes with free personal delivery :)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The gift of today

Today, I read an inspiring quote from a bookmarked blog. The site owner apparently did not know who the author was, so I did some Googling and found out it was from an American writer named Mary Jean Irion:

"Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart.
Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow.
Let me hold you while I may, for it might not always be so.
One day, I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow,
Or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky,
And want, more than all the world, your return." 

Much ado about nothing

Please humour me and let me have a good laugh. I've just been called a chick by a 24-year-old boy!  I must say, I was thoroughly amused (and, okay, maybe a bit flattered. When you're a thirtysomething married woman, you don't get this kind of attention as often as you used to.).

My brother-in-law casually told me the other day that one of his friends popped in his Facebook chat window. He said he was browsing through little bro's FB friends, and he saw this chick. "Is he your sister," he asked. Little bro told him, "Uhhh...yeah...? Why?" "'Coz she's a chick. Can I add her?" To which he replied, "He's my big brother's wife! Choose another chick from my friends' list."

So the friend went through little bro's contacts (I think he has about 500+ on his list). The verdict? "She's the only chick I could find!"

Hahahahaha!!!!!

Seems that there's much to-do about my profile pic. But, seriously, what's wrong with it? Okay, I know there's probably a bit of cleavage showing there, but I've seen worse in other photos. Besides, even my husband noted that the shirt I was wearing wasn't really out-of-the-ordinary. It's just a nice top I could wear to the mall or to visit relatives.

So it strikes me as a bit peculiar that I've been getting a lot of friend requests from guys I don't even know. And a smattering of messages from male acquaintances/former colleagues. Heck, even a good guy friend from university scolded me for the "revealing" photo (he said he was uncomfortable with the picture, and that he could see my, ahem, chest area even from the small chat window. (And this is a guy who is exposed to half-naked (and naked) women on a constant basis.).

And what did my husband have to say about all the male attention? "Yeah, you could change your profile picture, you know. Let's take a sexier photo of you."

Monday, February 22, 2010

A Father's Love

I was bloghopping today when I came across this site.

It's amazing how the blog owner is able to come up with the content for the site. All entries contain original scanned correspondences, from obscure Joes to the more familiar names such as Harvey Milk and J.D. Salinger, and references to the likes of President Roosevelt and Nikola Tesla.

What caught my attention was a wonderful and touching letter from an unknown soldier. I am posting the full transcription below, but if you wish to see the original handwritten letter, then please follow this link.

Wednesday
Oct 21, 1942

My Dear Little Girl,

Last night was a beautiful moonlit night. Every star that studded the sky was sparkling like a jewel. The air was crisp, but faintly perfumed, with all the fragrances only a lovely spring night can devise. Today it is raining hard, the wind is fierce and cold. Yes! It is miserable, something you want to pass by quickly, so that the night will again be beautiful.

Life too, Anne, is like the weather. Some days are so lovely, the happenings of those days so enchanting, you never can forget them. Some are so unhappy, you wish they never happened but, alas, they must for your life, your Mother’s, mine, everyone’s is so mixed up with joy and sadness that you never have one or the other for long. One replaces the other with a speed that is amazing.

Thus it happened just two years ago. Your Mother knew and I knew that you were going to be born. Those days were anxious ones, Anne. As the days went by your Mother used to smile at me with those lovely brown eyes. Eyes that shone with courage and resolve. If she had anxiety in her mind she never showed it but it must have been there. In my heart and mind torments raged that no one will ever know. But through all the doubts all the worries and all the long, anxious hours an end came, bringing with it, you.

From that hour, it was early in the morning, the lives of two people were filled with inexplicable happiness. When I called to see your Mother that day I shall never forget the beauty, the happiness that shone up at me from her precious little face. Neither will I forget the pride and the joy that surged right through me when the nurse brought you along and I held you in my arms.

Soon we took you home. The months sped by, and you gradually took a hold in our hearts. You laughed so much at such silly things we did to claim your attention. We showed you off to so many people. Your eyes, so big and questioning never failed to win admiration. Your curly hair was indeed a special joy.

And as each month sped by you grew. First you sat up, then stood up, then crawled, then walked. As each stage passed funny little incidents occurred. Perhaps no one ever noticed them or remembered them. But your Mother and I did. Every night, when I came home from work, there were stories of your conduct through the day to be told. Some days you were good and others you were naughty. Like, for instance, the day when a little mischievous spirit seized onto you and strips of wall paper came from the wall, Other thoughts came crowding into my mind, memories of days gone by when we laughed at you, scolded you, and, some serious times when we worried over you.

The first year of your life passed away, quickly perhaps, but you grew so quickly every day was an adventure not only for yourself but for us. You had a party for your first birthday, and although you sat up like Jacky you probably will never remember it. But that day you got “Goog’ga” for a present. Poor “Goog-ga”. As each week passed he got dirtier and more worn. And the dirtier he got the more you loved him. Then at Xmas,”Teddy” came along. Dear old Teddy. So plump and with such a frizzy coat. In a few months he was still plump but his hair was not so frizzy. Then, you’d never go to sleep unless Teddy and “Goog-ga” were tucked in with you. You’ll never know how angelic, how like a cherub you looked, when after your bath you were popped into bed with your little playmates. Indeed God is good. How many times have your Mother and I crept in to see you sleeping. And how many times have I wiped away tears, gentle little tears of happiness from her eyes when we came out.

All those days were so beautiful, like the night I sat and watched yesterday evening. But soon came the rain. Your lovely country, so free and so proud, was fighting for its life. Those indeed were dark days. I had to leave Mother and you and become a soldier. Thousands of other Daddies went too, because we had to fight so that all the Mothers and little boys and girls could live happily. That was many months ago. I do not know how long it will be before we will be home again together. But rain my little darling does not last for ever.
Through the blackest clouds a little piece of blue appears. The wind blows, and soon the clouds go. So too will peace come and then we can be all happy again.

Because I’m a soldier now Anne I cannot attend your birthday this year. You are going to have a party and I wont be there. But while that party is on I’ll be thinking of you and your Mother. Thinking of the day you came along, and of the days that have gone by since. You are lovely now, like your Mother. Some day, when you grow up, some man is going to be lost in your loveliness, like I was when I fell in love with your Mother. But no matter. We cannot have you forever. While we do we’ll teach you all the lovely things of life, and there are so many beautiful things in life. There are, too, bad things and, these also we will tell you about so that you’ll know how to pass them by.

Maybe it will be years before you will be able to read this letter but when you can you’ll know at least how much we love you and how much you mean to us.

I am looking forward to seeing you soon and to seeing those big brown eyes of yours laugh back at me. Until then my little girl.

Goodbye and God bless you on your birthday.

From your adoring

“Dad-da”


I should've known from the blog lead-in that it was a mistake to read it from my workstation. It is touching to me on so many levels.

For one, I am a parent and I could only sympathise with the pain and anxiety that a separation like that can bring. It must be heart-wrenching to leave behind your loved ones, not knowing whether you'll be coming back. As for the wife, I cannot imagine her agony. Look at me, hubby just goes on business trips and I get all pissy, worried and anxious all in one go. Although I must say it's a poor comparison; I really feel like a petty idiot now.

On another front, I see myself in the little girl. To those of you who do not know my background, my father had been a soldier for most of his life, having been a veteran of World War II and the Korean War. By the time I was born, he no longer went off to fight in wars, but I imagine he could have written me notes like that had I been born during those times. I knew my father to be an eloquent man so letters like that must come easy to him.

I'll never know whether the letter's author ever came home. And in much the same way, I would never know whether my father had it in him to express his love for me like that. Perhaps I should ask his children if they ever got letters like that. I certainly never did.

On second thought, maybe not. Some things are better left unknown. 

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A Month in Review

When somebody said that time flies, he sure wasn't kidding. It's already two days into February, and looking back at my January blogging...there's only one measly entry! This after making a resolution to increase the quantity and quality of my blogs! Tsk tsk tsk...

Now that the rant is out of the way, it's time to get back to business.

**********

Anyway, my son has already put in a month in Nursery school. Here's how it went, per week:

Week 1
  • Marked by daily bouts of separation anxiety. It was a chore-and-a-half for my mother-in-law to leave him in the classroom.
  • Cried a lot in class, even heaving up at times because of excessive bawling. He's okay upon leaving the house, but his panic increases in direct proportion to his physical proximity to school. The fact that the rest of the kids were crying their eyes out, as well, did not really help.
  • Didn't eat well during breaks (they are not allowed to bring in their own food, and he is used to being fed).
  • The teachers discovered he could read, and so sometimes he was made to read aloud in front of the class. I'm guessing it's a welcome respite for the tired teachers!
  • At the homefront, I implemented SSS - the Smiley Sticker Scheme. Each day that he "survives" school means a smiley sticker on the calendar. I also leave him little notes daily to encourage him to enjoy his classes.
  • Reward for earning 3 smileys out of 5: a trip to Candy Empire to get his favourite sweets.
Week 2
  • Missed two days of classes because of a throat infection. If you ask me, it was probably the stress catching up on him. That, or he had too much sweets from Candy Empire.
  • Seemed to be getting used to the school routine. When I told him he was going to be absent" and what the word meant, he was genuinely sad and said, "I hate being absent!"
  • Enjoyed going to school but was largely non-participative. According to my MIL (who watched discreetly from a window), my son didn't join the singing or the games. He just basically did his own thing, sometimes loitering around the classroom. I guess the teachers were just giving him a break and a chance to adjust better.
  • Began to trust his form teacher. He gets to the door and immediately takes the teacher's hand. It was an almost no-tears week!
  • 2 smileys out of 5. So no reward this week. Besides, he wasn't well enough to enjoy a day out, anyway.
Week 3
  •   No more crying episodes in school. But then there's the bargaining. Like on the way to class, he tells his Grandma, "I'm sleepy" or he wants to watch TV "just five minutes longer."
  • One time I brought him to school, he went out the classroom, close to tears, and told me he was tired, and where was I going? But I thought it's only because I was the one who brought him there, out of the routine, thus the clinginess.
  • Another time, he had to stay behind for 30 minutes after dismissal. The reason? He refused to finish his school work! And it was just a colouring activity! His form teacher called in my MIL and asked her to stay with him, to get him to finish the work, because he refused to listen to them.
  • Feedback from the form teacher: my son is extremely bright, but was very noisy in class. Can't stay seated. Doesn't pay attention to lessons. And refused to do his school work.
  • As a result of the non-compliance, I had to write a letter to his teacher to explain my son's personality quirk. He abhors it when someone tells him to do something "just because"...he'll simply dig in his heels and refuse. You need to explain satisfactorily before he agrees (takes too much after the mother, I presume...). And, of course, he's been exposed to a structured environment for all of two weeks, so he still needed time to adjust. The separation anxiety alone was a big hurdle for him.
  • Had to amend the SSS rules because of this. Instead of simply not crying, he now needs to participate and listen to his teachers for him to earn a smiley.
  • However, since the brouhaha transpired towards the end of the week, and he had earned some smileys already, a promise was a promise: he still got his Timezone play time for getting 4 out of 5 smileys.
Week 4
  • Greatly improved, especially after being given The Talk by his form teacher. I imagine being told you need to stay if your work is not done - to the extent of sleeping in the classroom unless you complete it - is enough to make a child behave. My son clarified, though, where it is he would sleep if there was no bed, and whether the lights and air-conditioning will be turned off. Gotta love this kid's spunk!
  • He is more open now and tells us stories of what happened during his day. The first three weeks, he usually just responds with "I don't know" when asked. He now shares brief stories with us, provided we ask the right questions. I think he will learn to tell us about his day on his own, eventually.
  • He now eats with relish, albeit slower than his classmates, and finishes his food (he said he didn't need to throw his buns in the trash bin anymore).
  • 4 smileys out of 5: I took him out to eat in a favourite restaurant, and got him some new storybooks.
I was pleasantly surprised to receive an SMS from his form teacher yesterday. Here's what she told me: Thank you for your letter of appreciation and updating me on issues relating to your boy. You and your family had really contributed a lot toward Miguel's learning and intellect. He's a really bright boy and a joy to have in class. He's doing alright in class last week compared to the second week when he was here, he is listening to me when I told him to wait for his turn, or to give his friend a chance to talk. Give him some time and in no time he'll understand that there are rules to follow in school. He is also getting along well with his peers.

Now isn't that a delightful thing to hear?  I'm so proud of him. It earned him two smileys in a single day.

Todate, I am still keeping the daily ritual of leaving him notes. I think this is something I have to do the entire year; one time I forgot, he seemed genuinely disappointed. But I can live with the daily note-scribbling, considering the emotional benefits he reaps from them far outweighs the very small time or inconvenience it requires from me.

As far as rewards go, I still plan to give him the occasional treat. I am planning to try spacing the rewards, placing it at 2-week intervals instead of weekly ones. Let's see if it works. He is currently working on 10 smileys for a trip to the zoo.

So that's my son's month in review. I hope things keep getting better. He's not making much progress with his Chinese lessons, though, but that's another problem for another day. One step at a time, I'm positive we have the school year licked.

 

All photos courtesy of Getty Images